Until you find love fulfilled in your own self, and you really have to understand what I mean to hear that—I mean, it isn’t something you can just hear and say, “oh, yes, I understand”—you have to ponder on it, just for a little while, until you find that mystical closeness to what I call “Reality,” which is, again, only a word to most people, not yet a reality.

Until we can find this mystical closeness to what I call “Reality,” wherein a warmth of relationship is flowing across the void into our nature—it works the same as the warmth or exchange we have with people—we’ll never be able to prevent the kind of thing that’s occurring between you and your husband.

And between you and anyone else that might take the place of your husband. Because this void just has to be filled. This sense of wrongness just has to be made right. An ego­centric person cannot bear this kind of existence, this loveless existence. He needs love to feel right, you see?

The wrongness of our separation from Reality HAS to be made right. It’s imperative. It’s mandatory. For the egocentric consciousness that is void and antagonistic to what Reality really is.

So, you see, as long as you are separate from Reality, there is something in your nature that is missing; as long as you stand apart from God, Truth, the Spirit of Understanding, the Bread of Life, the Intelligence, there is no exchange in which you give up your weakness for strength, you see?

And whereby you are fulfilled by your hungering and thirsting after this Reality, or Righteousness. Then you will be craving—your body will be craving—and you’ll climb the walls. You won’t be able to stand it. And if you do put on some sort of act for awhile, it will only be in the hope that someone will see your righteousness and your indifference, and will see that you don’t care, and will start feeling offended that you don’t care.

You see? And try to make you care, and he’ll start giving you the love that you wanted all the time, that you hope you’re going to get when you use these tactics. See? Some people do stand aloof, like they don’t really care, and this is almost a righteous attitude, almost—except that the design behind it is: when you show you don’t care, it reminds other people of a right state, see?

And it bothers them, so they have to try to make you care, and they give you more “love” this way, and you’ll drink it in, but pretend not to care, see? That’s the way it is. And, again, you’re still not right. Because you’ll still be drinking in the souls of others. You’ll be soaking up their nectar of life, using them for your sense of righteousness.

Your hunger will grow to desperate proportions. You become a monster, sucking everybody up in this huge mouth of yours. You’ve got to be very, very careful. There’s nobody in the world that can bear this state of need without somehow playing a game so that this need will be fulfilled.

"...if you can do this (completely detach yourself emotionally,) you’ll be loving your family, not living off what you call 'love.'"

We just cannot help it; so that while we are unfulfilled by the essence of Reality, there is this void that must be filled with other people’s essence, which will never satisfy us.

We get hungrier and hungrier, so always we’re playing games, emotional games—we’re playing emotional footsies, kneesies, with everybody, only to excite them, to turn them on, to stimulate them, so that their stimulation will love us back and excite us to feel right and full from the putrid, miasmic emanation that comes from their deterioration, which is caused by their reaction to our advances.

It’s the game that everyone plays. It’s the game we can’t stop playing because we’d be climbing the walls. You just take a person who has fulfilled himself with another person’s love all of his life, and deprive him of his “beloved,” which is really the substance of his being, the substance of his image, and his ego will not be able to stand it.

The communists know this trick full well. They put such a man in a prison; they isolate him for awhile, deprive him of his family—he doesn’t really love his family, he needs his family, but he calls it “love.” You see, this person is totally dependent on his family, the essence that the family gives off on demand.

So he’s NOTHING without this family, and without this family, he begins to have this horrible emptiness—he feels terribly guilty—and then he’ll do anything for a little bit of approval—from a communist, or a Nazi or any dictatorial source. For a little morsel of approval, these people are just like puppets on the end of a string. They’ll serve a new master.

They feel so deprived of this love and this approval, they’ll do ANYTHING for it, including murder. That’s what they’re really like—they’re only interested in their own self-righteousness.

Yes, if you can do this (completely detach yourself emotionally,) you’ll be loving your family, not living off what you call “love.”