Letter from a listener:

Hello,
I just listened to Through The Eyes Of A Child and I must say that it was brilliant. I also have children and have learned so much by watching & listening to them.

Children's thinking is so clear which reminded me of such situations that used to happen a couple of years ago when my daughter was only almost 2 years old. Everytime there were outbursts of anger and arguing amongst us adults, my little daughter would step right into the middle and pat on or pull on the angry person's pant leg and snatch their attention and so calmly say 'Its me, be happy, don't be mad.'

Of course we would all melt and feel so guilty after realizing how stupid we have been behaving. Whatever the fight was about seemed to have been forgotten about and we would go on about our day. This was so unbelievably amazing to me and my family.

I also loved to see the forgiveness children have within minutes, I mean minutes! after fighting with each other.

- Emily

What a father said when he sent this page to his son:

I said that I wouldn't bring it up anymore and I don't intend to harp on it, but I come across this last week and had been thinking about sending it to you anyway.

I want to re-emphasize that you are a great father, and I know that you adore your children. I repeat, your manner of discipline is not your fault, it is mine. You learned it from me. I learned it from my father, and I believe he learned it from his mother. I have vowed to break the cycle because nobody ever told me it was wrong, but it is.

This message is important from the child's point of view when his friends parent yells at him. Listen to what he has to say. Then think about how your children will perceive how they were disciplined when they were growing up.

Remember, discipline can still be firm and consistent even when it is done with love and kindness.

From both the military and your police training, you have been trained to control your emotions and your reactions. You know that you cannot lose control in your job. Your children and your family deserve more than anyone to benefit from that training and for you to teach by example and discipline with control and understanding rather than by emotion.

I love you! I am bringing this up to you only because if you don't know, you can't do anything about it until too late. Discipline with anger, yelling, and physical control with your children will always reach the point where they will challenge your authority. Once you and I learned to talk to each other, our relationship changed, and it changed for the better.

You have a good head on your shoulders. You have demonstrated that you make good decisions when you take the time to consider the options. I have complete faith in you, your abilities and your love for your family.

Take the time, talk this over with your wife. The two of you take the time to decide how you will both control and discipline your children, then both of you be consistent and work as a team and you'll be amazed at the results.

I love you. In spite of the cold, I had a great time yesterday. Thank you!

- Dad

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